Always the last place you look

I decided to make French Toast this morning out of a rock hard baguette but couldn't find the tiny bit of maple syrup left from the yearly bottle my sister brings from Vermont. When Alex finally emerged blinking into the morning light I told him I was looking for it. He was so appreciative about the breakfast and immediately went on the hunt for the syrup. On a chair to look on top of the fridge, cabinet, spice rack, strictly adhering to the rule of two people in a kitchen -- wherever one is, that's where the other wants to be. It was just irking me so much, plus he has this irritating thing where he always stays to the left rather than right when meeting someone face to face which he claims to have gotten from Tai Chi. So I dart right, he darts left, stalemates all over the place. (How, in 7 years of living together, have we not negotiated a better system for this? Finally today I agreed to try to start darting left.) Wally was throwing Goji berries around, the French Toast was burning, coffee grinds spilling, and at the moment I was going to say Please stop looking, he found that bottle with the nice orange leaf -- so pleased with himself. (Always an easy spot when you can't find it -- in the fridge, top shelf.) My response when he handed it to me, "You had to find it." (As in, you couldn't have just used honey or jam or something else.)

"Well that was the point of looking for it, wasn't it?'

Sometimes around me you really can't win.


  1. Alas, I've had to accept that there are items that are not found even when the official-family-finder looks.

    Another come-to-Jesus moment when I feel I'm getting old.

    You and Alex need blinkers, perhaps worn on the head like those hiking lights.

  2. I'm curious who is the official-family-finder! Maybe I'll find out sometime. I misplace everything, and never find most of it. The ones that disappear for eternity are those I put away for safekeeping. "come-to-Jesus moment" is a great expression. Blinkers!!! & Reflectors and some sort of alarm that goes off...

  3. Josh boasts constantly about how he knows where everything is and I can't find my way out of a box. But I remind him that HE PUT IT THERE. I swear I go to work and he just moves my stuff around for the heck of it.

  4. I often think back to a conversation we had when I first starting dating B. You said, "Are you still in the honeymoon phase?" and I said, "I don't know, how do I know when we've left the honeymoon phase?" and you said, "When he does something completely reasonable, like trim his toenails, but it annoys the hell out of you." So true!

  5. Who's the guy standing next to Alex?

  6. Anon - just saw this comment now and it's making me laugh a lot more than it should. One of those dumb/obvious jokes which is still pretty funny. Wonder if you would remember who you were.


Post a Comment

Popular Posts